jocelyncee: (girl genius)
I'm now officially taking my exams in March with everyone else.  This was a good decision on my part, as I was discovering how much less I retained from my first year.  Couldn't recall much at all, so now I have another 10 weeks to rectify that situation.

Considering that the only classes I'm enrolled in are languages, I shouldn't burn out on reading too badly.  At least, I shouldn't burn out on reading so badly that I fail a class.  Mostly translations for these two (Old Norse and second semester Latin.  Yes, geek.)

I had been so worried about postponing the exams for the wrong reason that I neglected to consider *why* I kept thinking about postponing them.  Turns out an objective look at my progress (which had been good) during the time I had been studying (not near long enough) and the amount of material I had left to cover in a week (unbelievably too much) made my decision for me very quickly.  I'm not ready, and I wasn't going to be ready in a week.  Made the call, sent the emails, so everybody knows and is happy.

Especially me. :)

I did another sensible thing, which was look at how much work I had left and try to sketch out a timeline for completing it.  Come to find out, if I proceed at the average rate I've been studying at over the break, I should be able to finish everything just before the new exam date.

Like hell I'd have been ready for that exam Monday.  And this realization came to me only after I'd rescheduled, and I was starting to feel the temptation of laziness, of "you still have a couple days before the semester starts... take a break!"

I'd had my break already though -- serious work stopped Friday afternoon, and today (Wednesday) was the first on that I've been able to really concentrate on this stuff.  I also started in on the semester today (it's been a year since Latin class, so I have some brushing up to do) and tomorrow I go do paperwork to attempt to owe the FedGovt less money in student loans this semester.  I had a good day of organizing things (including cleaning off my desk and getting the half a million German lit paperbacks back on the shelf in some semblance of order.)


So I'm not being the slug I want to be right now, in spite of just working through Christmas break.  I'm glad to be getting back to 1) a regular schedule 2) language classes!! 3) being around people generally, instead of just occasionally.  I do much better when I have to schedule alone time into my day as opposed to scheduling in social time.  I'm no fun if I stay home too much. :-P

Okay, that's officially enough now.  It's nearly tomorrow (again... 12-6 were the sleep hours last night) and I'm determined to get back to water aerobics tomorrow.  I need the activity, after six weeks of sitting on my butt all day (reading, studying, driving, writing, typing, playing Civ... all paragons of aerobic activity, lemme tell you).
jocelyncee: (creative)
Some power in the universe is taking care of me today.

I've spent the last few days being completely exhausted from intensive study for the written exam I have Monday, so much so that I couldn't stand to look at any book from Friday afternoon until last night about 8:30, and that was a graphic novel (Cathedral Child by Lea Hernandez, and much recommended).

I was still in a negative funk this morning, out of which I have been gradually lifted by various people over the course of the day.  It started with my husband this morning, who will support me no matter what, to a friend, to a professor in another department, to a fellow grad student who called me just now.  After the shorter coffee shop chats of the morning, I talked with her for 30 minutes, mostly about how I didn't feel as worried anymore.

I have a plan, and I'm putting it into action.  This is the qualifying exam for the real M.A. exam, which translated into my head as: this is just to make sure you're ready to take the real test.  All this is, is an assessment.  Not a judgment, which is how my mind understands things when I'm in panic mode (and probably induces the panic mode, come to think of it).

I'm going to be just fine.  I'm going to do the best I can, and not worry about what might appear on the exam.  There's no way I can know until I get it.  All I can do is be smart about what I study, and let the rest be how it will be.

If nothing else, a relaxed attitude will help hinder terrified blank-outs when I'm writing a week from today.
jocelyncee: (girl genius)
I may panic about the M.A. Exam eventually... but not today.

Why, you ask? Because I got shit done today. :) In fact, I read:

1) Das Erdbeben in Chili (The Earthquake in Chile) by Heinrich von Kleist, - short story, nice little "boy meets girl, boy gets girl in trouble, girl sent to convent, boy arrested, girl has illegitimate child and is sentenced to burning at the stake, girl has sentence reduced to beheading, freak earthquake releases boy from prison and saves girl from execution, boy and girl reunite, boy and girl seek to rejoin society but are killed by an angry mob" little tale. Kleist is a bit of a freak. I like him. :)

2) Der Besuch der alten Dame (The old lady's visit) by Friedrich Dürrenmatt - Play: old woman, now very rich, gets revenge on man who once betrayed her and on the town that shunned her. Delightful critique of the self-justifying tendencies of capitalist society and the people in it.

3) Die Soldaten (The Soldiers) - by J.M.R Lenz - Comedy, five acts. A confusing Storm-and-Stress play surrounding a young girl Marie and the soliders (among others) who are interested in her. I need more background info for this one.

I'm keeping a checklist of all of these works I'm supposed to read. If I was smart, I'd have it in Excel and let it calculate the percentage I've finished of each type: poem, drama, prose.

But I can chart this progress so far: I'm done with poetry up to the 19th century (post romaticism) and in addition to the three longer works I've read today I've begun the original Faust legend (Die Historia von D. Johann Fausten) before I go on to Goethe's play (Faust I).

It's three days to Christmas, and I still don't feel like it's almost here.

Here's the one bit of Christmas I have done though. Isn't it pitifully dinky? It's just like me to have a Christmas tree on top of a bookshelf.

Other than that, no reason for reality to have set in. I've bought presents (but not wrapped them) and I have yet to hear the Muppet Christmas album this season. That's probably it -- I should get that on the iPod for the trip to Joel's parents', just to get into the spirit of things.

There will be Kringle baking this weekend though, which should convince me that Christmas is coming (the goose is getting fat).  Maybe I can listen to the Muppets then.

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jocelyncee

April 2009

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